How to make a resolution you'll actually keep.
There's something remarkable about this time of year.
With the new year comes a new beginning, a fresh start, and renewed hope.
Oftentimes I miss the beauty in this small span of time so clearly designed for rest, reflection, and renewal as it can be filled easily with pressure, planning, guilt, and worry.
Instead of celebrating where I am and what I've accomplished in the past year, I find myself thinking of where I need to be, how far I am from reaching my goals, what may happen if I never achieve them, and what I need to be doing to make it all happen.
...Which has brought me to declare year 2016 as my resolution dissolution.
Now, resolutions can be great for some people. I really do love the concept of resolving to do better in whatever way speaks to you in this time.
It's just that every year I keep resolving to do or be something better, I forget to celebrate who I already am.
Just a few months ago I lost a dear friend to breast cancer. She was one of the most remarkable women I've ever had the privilege of knowing and an angel on earth in every sense of the word.
As we gathered to celebrate her life, it surprised me that although she lived purposefully, was devoted to others, her career, and her family; spent years volunteering and doing all the right things.... no one really cared about what she did.
We didn't spend hours talking about her various honors, awards, and achievements. It just didn't happen.
Why? Because to celebrate her life was to celebrate her. Not what she did, but the woman she was. We celebrated her unique and beautiful spirit, strong character, and ability to love so fiercely it is forever imbedded in your soul.
We remembered how she made us feel and felt blessed for the years we were given to experience such a bright light of joy.
I'm eternally grateful to Peggy for teaching me so much about friendship, faith, and generosity while she was here. And in her passing, I'm equally grateful for the reminder that this life is not about what we do. It's about who we are.
As I look at what this year holds for me, I see that it will be a year of learning, taking risks, and finding trust (none my forte, all necessary for growth). I know that above all, I want to feel connected to who I am and what I'm here to do.
I also don't want to just connect to who I am, I want to celebrate who I am. (Not who I need to be, want to be, feel that I should be, used to be, etc.)
I want to celebrate who I already am, who I've always been, and who I'll always be, because who we are is what we have most to offer in this world. I firmly believe that.
It's the one and only thing that no one else can offer. There will never be another you. There will never be another me. Unfortunately more often than not, we spend our lives trying to be someone else.
This year, I've resolved to be myself.
Instead of making a list of resolutions that I may or may not keep, I've reflected on what this upcoming year will be like and how I want to feel while I'm in it.
For example, the woman who gave me this idea is building a house and expanding her business this year. She wants to feel grounded and focused in the midst of all the changes. Her "resolution" this year is grounded expanse.
Though there's no list of to-do's, not to-do's or when to-do's, there's a clear picture of what she wants to accomplish and feel in the year 2016.
So, do you need a "resolution dissolution" this year?
Could you share more of your authentic self? Do you need help believing that who you are in this moment is a gift to yourself and others? Do you know you are already enough?
Does the idea of a simple phrase guiding your thoughts and actions in the coming year excite you?
Try creating your own resolution phrase by asking yourself the following questions:
What does this year hold for me?
How do I want to feel?
I'd love to hear what phrase comes to you, so please share if you feel most inclined.
Hoping you've had a happy new year.
Thanks so much for being you.